


Rumor Has It

by asuralucier



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: All talk no action but maybe also not, Kind of Preslash?, M/M, Wordplay, outsider pov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-13
Packaged: 2019-08-01 11:24:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16283693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asuralucier/pseuds/asuralucier
Summary: Hanji tests a hypothesis.





	Rumor Has It

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Don't mind me, I'm still living in post S1 of the anime. One of these days I'll probably catch up and write something more current...
> 
> I hope you enjoy! (This was started in 2013 and was meant to be just the spread of the rumor, but I cleaned it up and kind of gave it an ending.)

“I sleep with Erwin on Thursdays.”

It starts as a joke, really. More or less. 

Hanji has always liked to watch things -- she has got an equal knack for the unexpected or the ordinary; it's not in her nature to sit still and dawdle as things pass her by, and her eyes are always open. She's always watching. And she can see it, the way Levi's shoulders tense up, and the way his jaw sets tight. The lamps are low in the room, but she doesn't blink, and he doesn't disappoint.

“I'm pretty sure what you're doing is insubordination,” Levi offers dryly after a moment, after he’s managed to unlock his jaw. The syllables don’t exactly sit right, but that’s neither here nor there. 

It's interesting that Levi would choose that word, of all words; being someone who'd had to survive in the slums as a kid, you'd think he'd come up with better. But no, _insubordination_ it is. It's a word that has a clear origin, after all. It has history, hierarchical significance, and perhaps most importantly, _control_. It’s a word that Erwin would have liked. It’s a word that assumes responsibility, and not Levi’s either. 

“Apparently, he doesn't think so. But you can write me up and complain to him if you think it's...insubordinate.” Not that Levi has the authority to run her in for that sort of thing, but that kind of detail hardly seems important at present. Hanji is usually inclined to think that all details are significant but this, this is different, even special. 

A lot of things are written all over Levi's face (he's not nearly as subtle as he thinks, no) -- but first, Hanji notes that he looks like he needs a drink. Poor man, she'll think about offering him one, later.

“What you do is your own business, I have no reason to write you up for something that's clearly personal.” To his credit, Levi is also not nearly as unreasonable as most people make him out to be. He’s since survived; Hanji doesn’t think a man gets to survive in a world with so much madness by only clinging on to his own version of it. A man has got to adapt and a lot of Levi’s habits, as far as Hanji can see, betrays all of the other times that madness had nearly squeezed the very life out of him. Maybe that’s why Levi has embraced militancy down to his bones. 

Hanji reaches to touch his shoulder and she can feel his muscles twitch. It's like he's gone stone cold, because he doesn't even brush her away. Then her hand falls to her side again, and Hanji moves to sit next to him on a stool.

“...It doesn't bother you?”

“Why does that matter? Of course it doesn’t. Like you say, it’s _personal_.”

She takes a moment to steeple her fingers under her chin. Levi likes cleanliness, and Hanji...well, she likes things to be symmetrical and sensible, systemic and symptomatic. Titans are neither of those things, but every rule has got to have its exception. Otherwise, it's not really a rule at all.

“You think it's insubordinate.”

“Because it _is_. You're fucking a superior officer.” Levi's mouth twists, as if the words themselves are dirty (they are, kind of). Then he adds, “But no, it doesn't bother me because it's none of my business. Did you want something, or did you just come in to gloat?”

“Is that really something to gloat about?”

So Levi thinks she's gloating; now, there’s another word. One that’s just as telling as her being allegedly insubordinate. Hanji arches one eyebrow, and it looks like Levi realizes his mistake a beat too late, but he's not going to say anything; he can't.

After a moment, Hanji just claps him on the arm again, feeling him flinch, “Want to go for a drink? I’m buying.” 

 

Moblit is a good man. He's worked under Hanji for two years now, and he's quick on his feet and the stuff in his head isn’t too shabby, either. Plus, he doesn't exactly think that she's crazy (much). She likes Moblit just fine, but probably not enough to sleep with him.

None of this explains why he's been looking at her strangely for about two hours now. They're not even around any titans that could potentially bite her head off if she's not careful.

“You're killing me with the suspense, Mo.”

He doesn't like the nickname, but he's never said, not out loud. It’s always been this twitch, or that twitch. This time, it’s his temple; the vein practically jumps in rhythm. “What suspense, Major?”

“You don't usually look at me like that unless we're within ten feet of something that could eat us.” Granted, that means Moblit looks at her like that a lot, but under these particular circumstances, she’s probably allowed to find it strange. 

Moblit sighs, “...Forget it. It's ridiculous, anyway.”

“Tell me. Before I order you to.” It’s great that they all subscribe so much in militaristic hierarchy. 

“But,” Moblit opens his mouth, and then he closes it again. “The corporal thinks you're sleeping with Commander Erwin. He also thinks it's insubordinate.”

“He also apparently thinks you should know about it.” Which is actually the most interesting thing that’s come out of Moblit’s mouth so far, even if it is implied. 

“Ah. That. Well.” Moblit looks down for a minute, “I’ve always thought.” Then he steels himself, “Are you, Major?” 

Hanji thinks about lying. She can get away with it; plus, it doesn’t have to be a lie exactly, not forever. “I’m not. But I could be.” 

That interests him; Hanji can tell because it’s in his eyes. Moblit’s not a man to say very much, but his eyes always gives him away. He’d make a terrible liar and it’s just as well that Moblit has always professed to be an honest man, “...Why in the world would you want Levi to think you were?” 

“It’s good for him,” says Hanji. “It’ll make him think.” 

“Think about what?”

She shrugs. She does sort of know, but Hanji doesn’t have a real way of explaining it to him. “Things, I suppose. That he probably needs to think about.” 

Moblit looks her up and down, “Have I ever told you, Major, that you’re terrifying?” 

“Only for a good cause,” Hanji says. “I think I’ll take that as a compliment.” 

 

It’s inevitable really, that Erwin hears about it. Hanji hadn’t counted for the whole thing to spread like the wildfire it did, but really, Levi only has himself to blame. Erwin however, is not looking too amused. 

“Please don’t tell me you think telling these sorts of tales will raise morale, or something.” 

Hanji closes his office door behind her and puts on what she absolutely hopes is an innocent (enough) face: “I don’t know what kind of -- tales you’ve been hearing. But I’ve only told one person. Levi did the rest,” Hanji doesn’t think she has to, but she adds, “So he could have kept his mouth shut.” 

“You’re spreading -- no, that’s not right is it, promoting -- fraternization,” Erwin says. “And I don’t think you’re focusing in on the right issue, here. I could have you written up.” 

Fraternization. That’s another word that Hanji thinks that Levi will like once he’s learned it. “That’s a bit unfair, isn’t it? I didn’t imply that ours was an open arrangement.” At the idea of Erwin being open to those sorts of “certain arrangements” is laughable and absurd. The funniest thing in the world nearly, right up there with the once when someone had convinced Pixis to dress up as a certain lady of leisure in the name of charity the year before for one of those Inner Wall parties. Severe penalties had been handed out to all the guilty parties involved, but later, they’d all agree that the prank had been worth it. The only thing they’d forgotten to arrange was for a court artist to be present. So the moment itself was lost, although it was no less memorable.

“...He’s even beginning to use your threats,” Hanji returns. “You know, I miss the days when Levi threatened to break my neck.” 

“That’d be messy.” Erwin says dryly. 

“Words aren’t. Words are clean and they fester. Until they bloom and bluster into bureaucracy.” 

Erwin sighs, “...Did you have a point?” 

“I don’t have a point,” Hanji shrugs. “Really, the whole thing was a bit of an experiment. You could say I’m testing a hypothesis.” 

“Get out of my office.” 

 

“...You wanted to see me?” 

“I did.” Erwin folds away the piece of parchment in front of him before turning his attention to Levi, who looks and smells as if he’s spent the day outside. “You can sit if you’d like.” 

“I’ll stand, thanks.” 

“As long as you’re comfortable.” 

“I’m comfortable enough.” Levi says, with a flippant air as to imply that the notion if absurd. “I -- well, I don’t want to stay too long or interrupt. Am I in trouble?” 

And that makes Erwin think -- _Dear Lord, he does._ He doesn’t know why he’s never noticed it before, really, thinking of all of times when Levi just goes and does, thinking of all the other times the man manages to be present even before Erwin thinks to call for him. 

“What makes you think that?” 

Levi looks down at his feet, “It’s Thursday. I’m sure you have other things you’d rather be doing.” A touch of red has rose to his cheeks, but his hands don’t move from his side. 

“...Will you close the door?” 

The door to Erwin’s office is open just a sliver, and before Levi goes to close it, Erwin is gratified that the other man actually goes through the trouble of sticking his head out of the doorway and checking the hall. Only later, does he notice that he’s holding his breath.

“Nobody’s there,” Levi informs him without asking. “Thank fuck.” 

“Thank fuck,” Erwin echoes. “And you’re not in any trouble. -- Although there _is_ a strict rule against fraternization, and you’re right to remind your underlings that to engage in it so flagrantly is frowned upon.” 

“Erwin, I --” Levi’s face goes through several shades of red to plum to darkish gray before settling on pale. “There’s been an misunderstanding. What you do is your own business, I only said...” 

“We’ve both been had,” Erwin says simply after a pause. “She’s probably laughing at us right now.” 

Levi’s eyes are closed, as if he is trying to summon another version of the conversation they are having right now. Erwin does now, allow himself to wonder what kind of conversation Levi has in mind. Then he tells himself that he might not mind finding out, “...Don’t tell me, you don’t.”

“On the upside,” Erwin smiles with one side of his mouth, “I need to find something to do on my Thursdays.”


End file.
